Stages
When I was growing up it seemed every time I did something a bit different, be it good or bad, I was told it was just a stage.
As a teenage girl, changing boyfriends often, I was again told it was a stage. Going to college, I wanted to be a Veterinarian, (girls did not choose that field back then) so it was just another stage. "You like medicine? Be a nurse like your Mother.", Dad said. And I am quite certain he figured i would soon give up the desire to be a Vet since it was just a stage I was going through. Married and expecting my first baby, my mood swings were pretty extreme, hopping from anger to tears in a second. Once again --the dreaded "stage".
Stages have followed me all my life, through decision making , career choice, empty nesting, , menopause and now apparently, old age. I was thinking I was simply an older woman with normal desires and opinions. However, it seems that once again, I am going through a stage.
I am living in a place I would rather not be, and though I certainly do make that known at times, I try to find the best to be found in being here. The best thing has been a couple of really good friends.
Now Sherry, who has been my best friend, who cared for my dog, Daisy, for many weeks when I was in the hospital, who is always quick to run an errand for me, who has watched special Tv and movie programs with me, who has shared her life stories and listened to mine, is leaving. She is going back to Wyoming from whence she came. She has a home there, a special friend, and horses! I really don't know why she has stayed here so long, though I do know it had to do with family. I will miss her very much, while also being happy for her.
Then there has been Sylvia, a next-door neighbor. We have so much in common-in particular a love of goats. We have been close pals, fighting the rules here (she is a feisty one) and watching out for each other. When Sylvia did not come over, I would call her in the evening.
Two weeks ago, Sylvia did not answer her phone. I left a message. She did not call back. I called again and no response. Knowing something was amiss, I called her daughter, who came right away.
I will not go into the details of that horrible evening . Sylvia had a
stroke. She is now in Hospice in a nursing facility. A place she
said she would never be. Due to COVID, I cannot see her. Her daughter took a picture of Sylvia holding a toy goat I sent, and
e/m d the photo to me. In such a short time, she has changed so much. Is she going through a stage?
Am I going through a stage in which one loses friends? Is this
just to be expected when you reach the 80's?
As a teenage girl, changing boyfriends often, I was again told it was a stage. Going to college, I wanted to be a Veterinarian, (girls did not choose that field back then) so it was just another stage. "You like medicine? Be a nurse like your Mother.", Dad said. And I am quite certain he figured i would soon give up the desire to be a Vet since it was just a stage I was going through. Married and expecting my first baby, my mood swings were pretty extreme, hopping from anger to tears in a second. Once again --the dreaded "stage".
Stages have followed me all my life, through decision making , career choice, empty nesting, , menopause and now apparently, old age. I was thinking I was simply an older woman with normal desires and opinions. However, it seems that once again, I am going through a stage.
I am living in a place I would rather not be, and though I certainly do make that known at times, I try to find the best to be found in being here. The best thing has been a couple of really good friends.
Now Sherry, who has been my best friend, who cared for my dog, Daisy, for many weeks when I was in the hospital, who is always quick to run an errand for me, who has watched special Tv and movie programs with me, who has shared her life stories and listened to mine, is leaving. She is going back to Wyoming from whence she came. She has a home there, a special friend, and horses! I really don't know why she has stayed here so long, though I do know it had to do with family. I will miss her very much, while also being happy for her.
Then there has been Sylvia, a next-door neighbor. We have so much in common-in particular a love of goats. We have been close pals, fighting the rules here (she is a feisty one) and watching out for each other. When Sylvia did not come over, I would call her in the evening.
Two weeks ago, Sylvia did not answer her phone. I left a message. She did not call back. I called again and no response. Knowing something was amiss, I called her daughter, who came right away.
I will not go into the details of that horrible evening . Sylvia had a
stroke. She is now in Hospice in a nursing facility. A place she
said she would never be. Due to COVID, I cannot see her. Her daughter took a picture of Sylvia holding a toy goat I sent, and
e/m d the photo to me. In such a short time, she has changed so much. Is she going through a stage?
Am I going through a stage in which one loses friends? Is this
just to be expected when you reach the 80's?
Not a stage but a bittersweet moment in life. My mom and in laws are experiencing the same. And they are so sad, and grieving too. And I am sad for what they are losing, and sad over the loss of your friends too. Be good to yourself, it's okay to feel sadness and even to have a short pity party. But see the good too, life changes day to day
ReplyDeleteThank you Penni for your encouraging words.
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